Posts belonging to Category Abandonment
Posted by Susan Anderson, Psychotherapist on January 19, 2018
Future Self is the self we would like to become, the one we have every intention of becoming were it not for our patterns of self-sabotage that get in the way. Future Self is who we are today, except perhaps… thinner richer more spiritually evolved more confident more assertive less co-dependent, less people-pleasing happier more … read the full article
Categories: Abandonment, abandonment recovery, anxiety, Break Ups, Divorce, Falling in love, healing from abandonment, Heart Break, journey from abandonment to healing, Relationships, Self Esteem, Self Sabotage
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Tags: Abandonment, abandonmentrecovery, confidence, dreams, goals, happiness, love, selfesteem, selflove
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1 comment
Posted by Susan Anderson, Psychotherapist on May 25, 2017
You don’t need to change something all the way to make a huge difference in your life. You don’t have to go all the way from being codependent to being non-codependent, or from low self-esteem to high self-esteem. You need only to be in the process of improving it – even if progress is slow … read the full article
Categories: Abandonment, abandonment recovery, healing from abandonment, how to overcome self sabotage, Relationships, Self Esteem
| Tags: friendships, how to raise self esteem, HuffPost, relationships, self esteem
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Posted by Susan Anderson, Psychotherapist on April 10, 2017
My social media team, who devotedly administrates my pages, suggested that we come up with a list of “best quotes” – bite size insights – that you have strongly responded to. Thank you all for offering thoughtful comments, sharing your personal stories and struggles, and sharing our words with your own family and friends. Live … read the full article
Categories: Abandonment, abandonment recovery, anxiety, healing from abandonment, how to overcome self sabotage, Self Esteem
| Tags: Abandonment, abandonment recovery, best life, loneliness, relationships, self esteem, self-love, selfcare
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Posted by Susan Anderson, Psychotherapist on February 27, 2017
Susan Anderson © March 2017 Download the PDF version here. [email-download-link namefield=”YES” id=”11″] Please see my comments at the end of item # 40. An intense fear of abandonment. Difficulty forming primary relationships. Intrusive insecurity that interferes in your love life, social life and goal achievement. A tendency to repeatedly subject yourself to people or … read the full article
Categories: Abandonment, PTSD, ptsd and abandonment
| Tags: Abandonment, anxiety, Insecurity, post traumatic stress disorder of abandonment, PTSD, relationships, self esteem
| 3 comments
Posted by Susan Anderson, Psychotherapist on December 15, 2016
© Susan Anderson December 15 2016 I’ve been developing a profile of an abandoner for almost twenty years, collecting stories and insights from abandonment survivors from all over the world – from people writing to my website and attending my workshops, as well as friends, colleagues, and from my own experiences. Is there a profile … read the full article
Categories: Abandonment, abandonment recovery, anorexia, anxiety, borderline and ptsd, borderline personality disorder, healing from abandonment, Heart Break, heartbreak, Relationships, Uncategorized
| Tags: Abandonment, healing, love, relationships
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Posted by Susan Anderson, Psychotherapist on November 30, 2016
Healing abandonment involves summoning your creative energy. Your task is to create positive gains from adversity, growth in the place of woundedness. Whether you are struggling through a painful breakup, triggered by childhood issues that impinge in your life, fired from a job, feeling dismissed by a friend, or isolated because you can’t seem to … read the full article
Categories: Abandonment
| Tags: Abandonment, abandonment recovery, breakup, childhood issues, creativity, healing, huffington post, relationships
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Posted by Susan Anderson, Psychotherapist on November 4, 2016
The human condition The fear of abandonment is primal and universal to human experience, the crux of the human condition. We all have it. That’s why I write about it so much. Personally and professionally, I’ve discovered that it’s better to deal with our abandonment fear, know when it rears its head, than try to … read the full article
Categories: Abandonment
| Tags: Abandonment, abandonment recover, Emotional Crisis, healing, huffington post, love, mental health, positive change, relationships
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Posted by Susan Anderson, Psychotherapist on October 7, 2016
© Susan Anderson September 28 2016 Overview There was a big response to my first article describing the characteristics of PTSD of Abandonment – so many abandonment survivors writing in with open hearts to describe the way abandonment trauma has been affecting their emotional responses and their behavior patterns. The list below depicts typical symptoms experienced by people struggling … read the full article
Categories: Abandonment
| Tags: Abandonment, emotional flashbacks, fear of abandonment, loss, post traumatic stress disorder of abandonment, PTSD of abandonment, self esteem, Trauma
| 2 comments
Posted by Admin on May 27, 2016
I love to eat, and then eat. It’s just the consequences I hate. What’s a potato chip but a prelude to the whole bag? What’s an M&M but a tease for a fistful? I’ve watched people eat just one cookie and then turn away. I study them as if they are extra terrestrials. They must … read the full article
Categories: Abandonment, journey from abandonment to healing, Overeating, Self Esteem
| Tags: Abandonment, abandonment recovery, overeaating, self sabotage
| 2 comments
Posted by Admin on April 17, 2016
For many people, falling in love means becoming more vulnerable. It arouses our primal abandonment fear. It bubbles up from the deep, giving rise to feelings of insecurity that can cause some of us to become needy, clingy, or demanding, and others angry, frozen, or avoidant. To believe that your abandonment issues are blocking you … read the full article
Categories: Abandonment, abandonment recovery, borderline and ptsd, Self Sabotage
| Tags: Abandonment, recovery, self sabotage
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Posted by Admin on December 17, 2015
I’ve written previously about the differences between borderline personality disorder and post traumatic stress disorder of abandonment but here I’d like to explain why distinguishing the two seems important to me. It has to do with the stigma attached to the diagnosis of “borderline.” The two diagnostic categories (BPD and PTSD of Abandonment) have an … read the full article
Categories: Abandonment, abandonment recovery, borderline and ptsd, borderline personality disorder, BPD, bpd and ptsd, post traumatic stress disorder and abandonment, ptsd and abandonment, Relationships, taming your outer child
| Tags: Abandonment, bpd, PTSD, relationships
| 1 comment
Posted by Admin on October 4, 2015
Has it ever occurred to you that love may be staring you in the face, but you just can’t recognize it? Maybe the person is too easily taken for granted, too available, doesn’t push your old insecurity buttons. Or maybe s/he doesn’t match up to some antiquated high school ideal about what a good catch … read the full article
Categories: Abandonment, abandonment recovery, anxiety, Break Ups, Divorce, Falling in love, Outer Child
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Posted by Admin on September 11, 2015
Are you and anyone you know caught up in cycles of abandonment? Why do people keep repeating the same patterns over and over? What can they do to break free? One common pattern I call “abandoholism.” You’re alone because you are attracted to the unavailable. When someone comes along who genuinely wants you, you feel … read the full article
Categories: Abandonment, abandonment recovery, anxiety, Falling in love, healing from abandonment, Heart Break, how to overcome self sabotage
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Posted by Admin on August 17, 2015
Is it possible that abandonment has made you stronger? Most people are familiar with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, but what about Post Traumatic Growth? Post Traumatic Growth (PTG) is a concept developed over twenty years ago by professors Richard Tedeschi and Lawrence Calhoun to identify strengths we pick up from struggling through life’s adversities. When … read the full article
Categories: Abandonment, abandonment recovery, anxiety, borderline and ptsd, bpd and ptsd, healing from abandonment, Heart Break, how to overcome self sabotage, Relationships, Self Esteem
| Tags: abandonment recovery
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Posted by Admin on August 6, 2015
There’s nothing worse than being suddenly beset with intense anxiety and panic. It’s an emotional hijack — a hostile takeover by the fear center of your brain. The part of you that is usually reasonable and self-reassuring has been momentarily knocked out of commission. You feel out of control, helpless, demoralized by the emotional excesses … read the full article
Categories: Abandonment, abandonment recovery, anxiety, healing from abandonment, Self Esteem, taming your outer child
| Tags: Abandonment, abandonment recovery, anxiety, primal fear, PTSD, relationships
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Posted by Admin on June 22, 2015
The world is full of love-worthy, eligible people looking for a way out of involuntary singleness. They want to put an end to their cycles of abandonment and find a long-term mutual relationship. They are determined to overcome any self-sabotaging patterns that might stand in their way. Some may be attracted to the unavailable. Some tend to … read the full article
Categories: Abandonment, abandonment recovery, Falling in love, Relationships, Uncategorized
| Tags: falling in love, relationships, romance
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Posted by Admin on June 9, 2015
In working with the victims of abandonment trauma, I keep coming across folks who are emotionally anorexic. When people attempt to give them love, they can’t seem to take it in. They rather remain in a state of emotional starvation rather than risk abandonment – their greatest fear. As with almost all conditions, emotional anorexia … read the full article
Categories: Abandonment, anorexia, Break Ups, Divorce, healing from abandonment, Heart Break, journey from abandonment to healing, Outer Child, PTSD, Relationships, Self Esteem
| Tags: Abandonment, abandonment recovery, BPD and abandonment, healing from abandonment, outer child, PTSD and abandonment, self sabotage
| 5 comments
Posted by Admin on May 20, 2015
Click here to view recent articles. No matter the circumstances, on some level we blame ourselves when a relationship ends. We take it as a personal failure. The sorrow of heartbreak is not just about loss, but about self doubt. When rejection is involved in the breakup, it triggers primal rage which we turn against ourselves, beating … read the full article
Categories: Abandonment, abandonment recovery, borderline and ptsd, borderline personality disorder, BPD, bpd and ptsd, Break Ups, Divorce, healing from abandonment, Heart Break, how to overcome self sabotage, journey from abandonment to healing, Outer Child, post traumatic stress disorder and abandonment, Relationships, Self Esteem
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Posted by Admin on April 24, 2015
Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) and PTSD of Abandonment There is a significant overlap between borderline personality disorder (BPD) and post traumatic stress disorder of abandonment (PTSD of Abandonment). In attempting to distinguish them, we are met with a lot of fine lines and nebula. Since there is a stigma attached to BPD, defining the difference … read the full article
Categories: Abandonment, borderline personality disorder, BPD, bpd and ptsd, Break Ups, healing from abandonment, Heart Break, Outer Child, PTSD, Relationships, taming your outer child
| Tags: Abandonment, borderline personality disorder, divorce, heartbreak, Insecurity, outer child, relationships, self sabotage, Trauma
| 5 comments
Posted by Admin on April 8, 2015
It isn’t fear of abandonment that sabotages our relationships, it’s how we handle it. Fear of abandonment is primal fear – not something we get rid of. It is essential and universal to all human beings, a driving force in our connections. It can either interfere in our relationships or reinforce them. Once we learn … read the full article
Categories: Abandonment, Break Ups, Divorce, Heart Break, Outer Child, PTSD, Relationships, Self Esteem
| 2 comments
