Posted by Admin on May 27, 2016
I love to eat, and then eat. It’s just the consequences I hate. What’s a potato chip but a prelude to the whole bag? What’s an M&M but a tease for a fistful? I’ve watched people eat just one cookie and then turn away. I study them as if they are extra terrestrials. They must … read the full article
Categories: Abandonment, journey from abandonment to healing, Overeating, Self Esteem
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Tags: Abandonment, abandonment recovery, overeaating, self sabotage
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2 comments
Posted by Admin on April 17, 2016
For many people, falling in love means becoming more vulnerable. It arouses our primal abandonment fear. It bubbles up from the deep, giving rise to feelings of insecurity that can cause some of us to become needy, clingy, or demanding, and others angry, frozen, or avoidant. To believe that your abandonment issues are blocking you … read the full article
Categories: Abandonment, abandonment recovery, borderline and ptsd, Self Sabotage
| Tags: Abandonment, recovery, self sabotage
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Posted by Admin on December 17, 2015
I’ve written previously about the differences between borderline personality disorder and post traumatic stress disorder of abandonment but here I’d like to explain why distinguishing the two seems important to me. It has to do with the stigma attached to the diagnosis of “borderline.” The two diagnostic categories (BPD and PTSD of Abandonment) have an … read the full article
Categories: Abandonment, abandonment recovery, borderline and ptsd, borderline personality disorder, BPD, bpd and ptsd, post traumatic stress disorder and abandonment, ptsd and abandonment, Relationships, taming your outer child
| Tags: Abandonment, bpd, PTSD, relationships
| 1 comment
Posted by Admin on October 4, 2015
Has it ever occurred to you that love may be staring you in the face, but you just can’t recognize it? Maybe the person is too easily taken for granted, too available, doesn’t push your old insecurity buttons. Or maybe s/he doesn’t match up to some antiquated high school ideal about what a good catch … read the full article
Categories: Abandonment, abandonment recovery, anxiety, Break Ups, Divorce, Falling in love, Outer Child
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Posted by Admin on September 16, 2015
Are you attached to someone who doesn’t seem as committed as you are? Maybe they’re giving you double messages, keeping you at arm’s length, or pulling away when you try to get closer. Whatever the signs, your fear of abandonment has been triggered and you want to go back to feeling secure. It’s disquieting to … read the full article
Categories: Falling in love
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Posted by Admin on September 11, 2015
Are you and anyone you know caught up in cycles of abandonment? Why do people keep repeating the same patterns over and over? What can they do to break free? One common pattern I call “abandoholism.” You’re alone because you are attracted to the unavailable. When someone comes along who genuinely wants you, you feel … read the full article
Categories: Abandonment, abandonment recovery, anxiety, Falling in love, healing from abandonment, Heart Break, how to overcome self sabotage
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Posted by Admin on August 17, 2015
Is it possible that abandonment has made you stronger? Most people are familiar with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, but what about Post Traumatic Growth? Post Traumatic Growth (PTG) is a concept developed over twenty years ago by professors Richard Tedeschi and Lawrence Calhoun to identify strengths we pick up from struggling through life’s adversities. When … read the full article
Categories: Abandonment, abandonment recovery, anxiety, borderline and ptsd, bpd and ptsd, healing from abandonment, Heart Break, how to overcome self sabotage, Relationships, Self Esteem
| Tags: abandonment recovery
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Posted by Admin on August 6, 2015
There’s nothing worse than being suddenly beset with intense anxiety and panic. It’s an emotional hijack — a hostile takeover by the fear center of your brain. The part of you that is usually reasonable and self-reassuring has been momentarily knocked out of commission. You feel out of control, helpless, demoralized by the emotional excesses … read the full article
Categories: Abandonment, abandonment recovery, anxiety, healing from abandonment, Self Esteem, taming your outer child
| Tags: Abandonment, abandonment recovery, anxiety, primal fear, PTSD, relationships
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Posted by Admin on June 22, 2015
The world is full of love-worthy, eligible people looking for a way out of involuntary singleness. They want to put an end to their cycles of abandonment and find a long-term mutual relationship. They are determined to overcome any self-sabotaging patterns that might stand in their way. Some may be attracted to the unavailable. Some tend to … read the full article
Categories: Abandonment, abandonment recovery, Falling in love, Relationships, Uncategorized
| Tags: falling in love, relationships, romance
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Posted by Admin on June 9, 2015
In working with the victims of abandonment trauma, I keep coming across folks who are emotionally anorexic. When people attempt to give them love, they can’t seem to take it in. They rather remain in a state of emotional starvation rather than risk abandonment – their greatest fear. As with almost all conditions, emotional anorexia … read the full article
Categories: Abandonment, anorexia, Break Ups, Divorce, healing from abandonment, Heart Break, journey from abandonment to healing, Outer Child, PTSD, Relationships, Self Esteem
| Tags: Abandonment, abandonment recovery, BPD and abandonment, healing from abandonment, outer child, PTSD and abandonment, self sabotage
| 5 comments
Posted by Admin on May 20, 2015
Click here to view recent articles. No matter the circumstances, on some level we blame ourselves when a relationship ends. We take it as a personal failure. The sorrow of heartbreak is not just about loss, but about self doubt. When rejection is involved in the breakup, it triggers primal rage which we turn against ourselves, beating … read the full article
Categories: Abandonment, abandonment recovery, borderline and ptsd, borderline personality disorder, BPD, bpd and ptsd, Break Ups, Divorce, healing from abandonment, Heart Break, how to overcome self sabotage, journey from abandonment to healing, Outer Child, post traumatic stress disorder and abandonment, Relationships, Self Esteem
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Posted by Admin on April 24, 2015
Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) and PTSD of Abandonment There is a significant overlap between borderline personality disorder (BPD) and post traumatic stress disorder of abandonment (PTSD of Abandonment). In attempting to distinguish them, we are met with a lot of fine lines and nebula. Since there is a stigma attached to BPD, defining the difference … read the full article
Categories: Abandonment, borderline personality disorder, BPD, bpd and ptsd, Break Ups, healing from abandonment, Heart Break, Outer Child, PTSD, Relationships, taming your outer child
| Tags: Abandonment, borderline personality disorder, divorce, heartbreak, Insecurity, outer child, relationships, self sabotage, Trauma
| 5 comments
Posted by Admin on April 8, 2015
It isn’t fear of abandonment that sabotages our relationships, it’s how we handle it. Fear of abandonment is primal fear – not something we get rid of. It is essential and universal to all human beings, a driving force in our connections. It can either interfere in our relationships or reinforce them. Once we learn … read the full article
Categories: Abandonment, Break Ups, Divorce, Heart Break, Outer Child, PTSD, Relationships, Self Esteem
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Posted by Admin on March 27, 2015
Without realizing it we’ve been trying to improve the relationship we have with ourselves all of our lives, just not effectively. Most of us wish we could have higher self esteem. The good news is that we don’t have to go from having low self esteem to having high self esteem; we only need to … read the full article
Categories: Abandonment, BPD, Break Ups, Divorce, Heart Break, Outer Child, Relationships, Self Esteem
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Posted by Admin on March 27, 2015
Heartbreak hurts so deeply because it pulls at that raw abandonment nerve we all share. It rips us open to the core, overwhelming us with powerful emotions — loss, despair, panic, shame, hopelessness — that seem all out of proportion to the actual event. Here are 12 facts to help you: Read more here on … read the full article
Categories: Abandonment, Break Ups, Divorce, Heart Break, Outer Child
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Posted by Admin on February 25, 2015
In looking out for helpful information on behalf of my readers, I’ve come across a few pills. Pills? You mean abandonment pills? For when you’re going through heartbreak and loss? Is there a pill for heartbreak? Well, sort of. People have always wished there could be a magic pill (like a Tylenol for broken heart) … read the full article
Categories: Uncategorized
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Posted by Admin on February 9, 2015
When something triggers our primal abandonment pain — like a breakup, getting fired or rejected by school admissions, or dissed by a friend — it can be so ferocious and debilitating that we’d do almost anything to get past it. Read more here on Huffington Post! Click here to view recent articles. © Susan Anderson February 9, 2015
Categories: Abandonment, Break Ups, Divorce, Heart Break, Outer Child, Uncategorized
| Tags: Abandonment
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Posted by Admin on February 8, 2015
I developed the abandonment recovery program after the love of my life – my marital partner of eighteen years – suddenly up and left me for another woman. Read more here on Huffington Post! By Susan Anderson © 2015 Click here to view recent articles.
Categories: Abandonment, Break Ups, Divorce, Heart Break, Outer Child, Relationships
| 1 comment
Posted by Admin on January 15, 2015
There was a report yesterday in the Daily Mail of a swan apparently committing suicide over the death of its mother. The photographs in the article may be open to interpretation, but they drive home the point that grief can be painful stuff and overwhelm us with feelings of inescapable loneliness and hopelessness. Human beings … read the full article
Categories: Uncategorized
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Posted by Admin on December 22, 2014
Excited about the holidays? Stressed out by them? Both? Just when you thought happiness was a positive thing, someone has to come up with Eustress – the stress you get from feeling good. Eustress is the flip side of distress – its etymology: eu = good and stress= stretching apart. Eustress is the heightened emotional … read the full article
Categories: Abandonment, holiday season, Outer Child, Relationships
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