Abandonment and Outer Child Specialist Training with Susan Anderson

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Training in Abandonment and Outer Child techniques is experiential. You learn by performing exercises and sharing feedback within a supportive group setting. Susan creates a safe, open, working, life-changing process within the group.

Abandonment Recovery Component: Through training you learn how to:

  • Help people through the five stages of abandonment (Shattering, Withdrawal, Internalizing, Rage, and Lifting (SWIRL).
  • Practice techniques that heal abandonment survivor’s damaged relationship to self.
  • Practice Akeru – a mental exercise program for each stage of the SWIRL process.
  • Perform the 12 steps of emotional and spiritual healing.

Outer Child Component:

  • Target Outer Child patterns of self sabotage. Outer Child is an overarching concept that encompasses defense mechanisms, character traits, knee-jerk reactions, habits and compulsions – all of your maladaptive behavior patterns.
  • Identify Outer’s emotional triggers.
  • Connect dots between automatic defenses and primal abandonment fear.
  • Learn exercises that redirect attachment energy toward learning healthy new “automatic” behaviors.
  • Practice using new power tools to break through obstacles, change behavior patterns, and propel you forward.

Advanced Clinical Training: Through a combination of didactics and experiential training, you:

  • Discern acute abandonment crisis from chronic patterns such as mood or anxiety disorders, as well as long standing outer child patterns of self-sabotage.
  • Learn new information from neuro-science upon which new treatment approaches are built.
  • Distinguish normal (albeit intense) abandonment grief from the onset of major depression.
  • Identify acute symptoms of the emotional crisis of abandonment, including:
    • Re-emerging symbiotic feelings
    • Increased risk-taking
    • Neglected self-care
    • Anorexia
    • Suicidality
    • Panic
    • Need to self-medicate
    • Borderline regression and other forms of acting out
  • Identify chronic (versus acute) symptoms of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder of Abandonment. In “Journey from Abandonment to Healing (pages 41-42)” I outline a complete list of abandonment’s posttraumatic symptoms, which comprise what I have come to call the “outer child syndrome.”

Outer Child Syndrome:

    • Difficulty forming primary relationships
    • Rejection-sensitivity
    • Poor self-image
    • Addiction
    • Co-addiction
    • Chronic insecurity
  • Help clients work through tendency to get caught up in Outer Child patterns such as abandoholism or abandophobism, or stuck in one the five stages of abandonment grief.
  • Deal with the intense transference that our clients exhibit during their abandonment crises including (when their Outer Children are most triggered):
    • Over-dependence upon therapist
    • Hostility
    • Missing appointments
    • Unrealistic expectations toward therapeutic process, etc.
  • Discern client’s tendency to temporarily revert to default defenses, i.e. becoming over-controlling toward the abandoner, punitive, self-abdicating, and other Outer Child maneuvers.
  • Help the still fragile, narcissistically injured abandonment survivor move beyond protest, blame, self-denial, and acting out, and on toward emotional self-reliance, behavioral change, and increased capacity for love.
  • Learn effective new tools experientially within the safety and open sharing of a supportive group process.

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